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Hunting in the deep dark woods and further creative ventures


This is the yeast of my worries

Since last winter, I've started making more bread items. I've slowly been getting better (but then again,  it's kind of impossible to mess up if you follow the recipe exactly), and making more. Today, I decided to make cocktail buns (a Chinese bun with coconut filling). More on that later. Right now, I want to talk about something that makes bread come alive. Yeast.

Yes, yeast. Now, yeast is one of those things that, for me, makes making bread seem like the single most barbaric activity known to man. As far as (presumably) insentient lifeforms go. Yeast are eukaryotic micro organisms. They belong to the kingdom fungi, and unicellular things that reproduce via mitosis (though some reproduce via "budding", but it depends on the species). These little guys are busy little things that multiply to make bread rise, and whatever else yeast happens to do (I'm NOT reading up on 1,500 species). Now, while I might be fine with wearing fur pelts and poking around with dead things in anatomy labs and biology class, I feel an overwhelming pang of guilt when baking bread. Let me count the reasons why.

1. They are creating a colonies, and the baker is their god.
I know. It's just a little bit blasphemous, but I can't help it. Now, not only is the baker their god, but the baker is a vengeful god. They give the little yeast beings life, allowing them to flourish and grow. Then, out of nowhere, the god reaches down from the heavens, and releases their wrath. Pounding on them, flattening them to smithereens, destroying their livelihood. I know that it's just getting rid of gases (isn't science neat?), but it still seems horrible. If I were part of the yeast colony, I would be picturing this:
And questioning what we did wrong. Later, the vengeful baker again poses judgement day, but sending the yeast colony into the fiery hell of The Oven.

2. Try picturing yeast as adorable little fluff balls that make high pitched singing noises.
In reality, baker's yeast looks like this (on a microscopic level)...
I picture the little yeast as something like this...

Apparently I have a huge number of issues. I'm kind of shocked that I eat bread.

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